is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
