i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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