Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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