i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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