No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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