How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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