Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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