I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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