Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize