Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
