Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
