I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
