all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
