I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Dignity is for republicans.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
