You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize