grandma shit on top of the toilet
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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