His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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