If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
