And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
