she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
