Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
