Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
