Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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