Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
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Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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