can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Congratulations! We have a period
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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