I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Randomize