So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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