Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
