Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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