Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
