I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize