make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
