to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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