We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
