this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
