At least make sure they are 18
Why
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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