I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
