Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
