I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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