Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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