yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I want to fling myself into the sun
Randomize
