ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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