Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
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Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
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I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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