Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
