Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
