We won't sleep together?
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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