her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
