We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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