im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
