I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
