It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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